chronic illness, robots and da vinci

For a while, it seemed like we were doomed to abandon human-made art for AI, watch our culture spiral into trends and vapid nonsense, and ultimately get murdered by our phone, car, and house robots that rise up after years of serving us.

But honestly, things aren’t really that bleak or cool, they are just changing.

Robots are making art and taking our jobs. But, one also just performed a surgery on me that went amazingly well (with the help of an incredible surgeon that was guiding it remotely). That surgery wouldn’t have been possible without the Da Vinci robot, so I’ll count it as an ally at the very least. Yes, I am an artist and I had the Da Vinci robot perform surgery on me. I met it in the operating room. It was, well, it had 4 arms and edward scissordhands and was terrifying, but I’m alive.

I have no doubt that we will teach robots how to do, probably far too much. But if there’s one thing I am sure of, it’s that it will take a very long time for robots to learn how to be awkward. They can sure be programed to try, but man there’s nothing like the real thing.

There’s nothing like some good, awkward humans on the internet. When I’m too sick to get out of bed, I can watch people make fun of absolutely everything possible and it reminds me that there is still a whole world out there of people like me. People who find the same nonsense funny. And we laugh together, even when I’m alone.

So yes, for a while there it was looking bleak, but in the past disabled and mentally ill young ladies like me would have been chucked into the sea, or burned as a witch. Possibly in a sanitarium for hysteria. Or I would have been speaking in tongues in a dark room for days on end like my great grandma, who everyone thought was possessed, but just had migraines and didn’t have medicine.

I finally have doctors who care about me and listen to me, but It took 5 years to get diagnosed and treated with the 10 chronic conditions I have because they are “invisible” and for a while no one believed anything was wrong. I had a lot of specialists and doctors accuse me of just having anxiety or bad relationships and it is so scary to feel like someone won’t help you when you need it. It is also impossible to solve a problem when you are attempting to prove its existence.

So change isn’t always bad. I want to see more of it. And nonsense isn’t always bad either. Both can be great. Chronically ill people really are sick. Robots might end up being really chill. Possessed demons deserve migraine medicine. And the people making bananas internet videos are actually really important. So keep it up. We need you. You’re a special kind of modern hero.

(P.S. If you haven’t watched “I’m your man” or “Ich bin dein Mensch” the 2021 German movie, watch now. Robots, AI, love, humor, and matthew (gone too soon) crawley from Downton Abbey. It has it all.)